Saturday, August 2, 2014

Like A Deer On Ice

I was walking barefoot on the carpet the other day and notice it kind of felt slippery.  A slippery carpet?  How can that be.

I went into another room and felt it and then when I put shoes on, I noticed my feet were pretty slippery inside my shoes.

I figured I had put something on my feet that made them slippery, or maybe the fake linings of the shoes were causing my feet to slide around, so I didn't say anything and figured when I took my shower, it would all go away.

But when I came in from the outdoor shower, I slipped in the bathroom.   Where there was no water on the floor.   And then noticed that the carpets everywhere were kind of slippery.  I made sure to wash my feet, so this made no sense.

After nearly wiping out numerous times in the bathroom, I finally decided to ask k-ster if he was noticing it too, or if I was exuding some sort of chemical that was making my feet extremely slippery.

Like everything before me was going to become a bobsled course where I'd go whizzing around corners and hand on for dear life.

He kind of mumbled "maybe" and then I forgot about it until the next time I went into the bathroom (this time with socks) and realized something was drastically wrong in the house.  Walking around something on the carpet was like taking your life in your hands because if you walked too fast, you might wipe out around a corner.

On carpet.

So, a day or two later, I asked him again.  "Have you noticed the floors are extremely slippery?  Like even the carpets?"

This time, he agreed.

And we puzzled on it for days, walking slowly into the bathroom, grabbing onto things for support.  I had visions of one of us forgetting and crashing to our deaths in the bathroom one night, having to explain to everyone "we don't know, the floors just got so slippery and he/she must have forgotten and stood up from the toilet too fast and hit his/her head on the sink and that's where I found him/her as I was tiptoeing in"

And then it hit me:

K-ster has been chaffing with the summer heat when he runs, so he got some bodyglide and loved it.  The first kind was like a deodorant stick and when it ran out, he thought he'd try another kind.  In a spray.

And where did he spray that spray?

Of course, on the bathroom floor. 

And then we tracked it all over the house.  We've been sliding for weeks.

It's supposed to clean up with soap and water, so when I washed the bathroom floor, guess what?  Instead of cleaning up, it allowed the water to bead up and added an extra layer of slide to the already treacherous linoleum. 

I think we're going to have to add grab bars all around the bathroom because it's not getting any better.  The carpets seem to be mostly fine, and the one pair of shoes that were affected had insoles that could be washed, so they seem to be fine.

But that bathroom floor?

A luge course.  Pee at your own risk.


  1. Wow, that is crazy that it made your whole house slippery like that.

  2. Who would have thought! Once when I was a kid, I spilled an entire bottle of cooking oil in the kitchen and tried to clean it up myself. Of course I couldn't get it all and we had a good slide. I thought k-ster had done something similarly silly.

  3. that recycled t-shirt basket in your etsy shop is super cute!


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