I grow things, I ride things, I bake things, I can things, I sew things and I make things. Sit with me on Aunt Mildred's Porch to witness this crazy journey I call my life and share the fun, laughter and utter foolishness that I come across from day to day. If you don't want to see pictures of my butt, you should just move along.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
This Post Will Ensure I Never Receive Another Gift
My name is Sparkling, and I'm a regifter.
I can't help it. It's the thrifty side of me. It's the environmentally friendly side of me. It's the side of me that can't just stick something in a closet and never use it.
I think it's in my Scottish/Irish/English blood.
Everything must have a purpose. A purpose deemed by me, of course. When you hand me a gift and then have to explain its usefulness, I'm probably already running down the list of possible future recipients.
I think the first time I revealed my penchant for regifting might have been in about 6th grade. Someone had given me a book that I judged by its cover and chose to never read. So, when it was my friend's birthday, I wrapped it up and gave it to her. And only after she opened it did I have a strange feeling that my very own name might be in the front cover. Yep. Ooops.
Or, it might have been when I was younger, maybe in Sunday school, when we had the kids shopping day which was basically a yard sale and we could buy all kinds of crazy for just pennies. I thought I had died and gone to heaven. In the Catholic church, no less. Give my family junk they will never ever use and call it Christmas?
Little did I know that THEY might regift too.....
My family well knows my desire to get things out of my house that I will never use, while spreading the joy of giving something to someone else. We all do a pretty good job of giving each other things that we will actually use, usually right away. We're all purposeful like that.
But since the invention of ebay, there's been a bit of an echo throughout the gift opening session on Christmas. It goes like this: "if you don't like it, please don't sell it on ebay, I'll take it! No, really, I like it and I'll use it. Really."
I don't have to worry about students giving me useless presents. For about the past 10 years, the only thing I've received from kids is baked goods and you can read about my feelings toward these gifts right here.
Doesn't everyone play the gift card shuffle during the holidays? You can get an unexpected gift card from someone and then the next day, someone you hadn't planned on needs a gift?
Voila, problem solved. Isn't that what gift cards were made for?
What do you mean grandma won't use a card to Sports Authority? Should I have given her Bass Pro Shops?
The baby can't use a Starbucks card?
Sometimes you have to cut your losses and buy a stinkin' gift.
I like to keep that to a minimum.
So, let's recap:
It's environmentally responsible to regift. It keeps the closets uncluttered, thus reducing fire hazards.
It's thrifty. You weren't going to use it anyway, someone needs a gift. It's a win win.
All things need a purpose. Its purpose can't be fulfilled sitting at the bottom of your cedar chest. Pass it on and let it have a chance to live out its purpose.
But most important of all:
Do NOT. I repeat, DO NOT forget who gave you the gift in the first place.
And as I learned in 6th grade, check to see if your name is in something before you hand it away as a lavishly indulgent present!
In writing this, I have to admit that I don't get upset if you regift something that I gave you. Chances are it might come back to me anyway!
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