Monday, August 1, 2011

I'm Off to Hollywood Now, So Long Suckers

Well, I won't have to worry about Botox anymore.  Hollywood will take care of that for me. 

Because today, I'm going to be discovered.  Adam Sandler himself is going to be so impressed with how PERFECT I am for his next movie, he'll scoop me right up.  By this time next week, it'll be the big time for me!

They're filming a new Adam Sandler movie around here and we just got word that Richmere is to be one of the new shooting locations.  According to the newspaper, this week is the week they will be shooting there.  They will be shuttling bus loads of people.  Down this tiny narrow street to a club on the ocean that can't handle bus loads of people.

I'll arrive to teach my Pilates class, or maybe my water aerobics class and there will be just this MOB of people.  People will be everywhere, all aggravated.  I'll drive in and park, all non-chalant like I am, and hop out to go teach my class.   I could never be distracted by these actor types, so I'll just go about my business, pushing past people to get to my group.

Out of nowhere, Adam will just appear at my side and say "Hey.  Hey you!  Stop right there"

And I'll be like "Hey, I'm supposed to be here, I work here, asshole" (because I never pay attention to what people look like, so how would I know it's him).  Now that I've been accused of being OLDER than I am, I've developed a new attitude with strangers.  Men, in particular. 

And he'll be like "whoa, looks AND an attitude.  You're just what I want for my next film.  DON'T GO ANYWHERE.  Let's talk business"

And then we'll go chat and draw up a contract and I'll be like "sorry ladies, can't teach Pilates today, I've got a private jet to catch.  SEE YAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!"

I always knew Richmere would provide some connection for me, I just wasn't sure what.  And my dad always says "Yeah, being part of National Honors Society- that'll get you places"  WhatEVER.  Laying on my back (in Pilates OF COURSE) is what's gonna get me places.


  1. Hahaha! Yes, I can see this is exactly how it's going to play out ;)

  2. How cool would that be??? I hope you got to see them filming. I saw a movie filming once and it was really fun. Marisa Tomei and Christian Slater. It was cool.


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