Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Crying Wolf and Feeling Holy

Do you see this?????  This is why I've called you here. Do you see that very thin layer of slush?  Do you know how dangerous slush can be?  So dangerous that they have to cancel school!  That's right.  All of the superintendents in the area drank the Kool Aid  and hopped on the school cancellation bus which made a stop in my town.

All because last night, the weathermen said BIG STORM, BLIZZARD, WATCH OUT, DANGER, WILL ROBINSON. I taught a Will Robinson many moons ago.

I remember as a child that the ONLY TIME we had school canceled the night before would be if there was such bad storm, we couldn't shovel out for days.  And even that was a very rare occurrence.  Instead, we woke up and stood around the radio (it was rare to put it on TV in my younger years, not implying I'm so old we didn't have a TV) waiting for the big announcement.  And really, my mother always knew before we did because my father plowed.    Those were exciting times.

But now, we have such sophisticated equipment, everyone believes that the weathermen can't be wrong.  Right?  I mean, they have Doppler.  They have Pinpoint something or other.  THey know their shit, right?  How can they be wrong?  And, we always have to think about being sued, thanks to the great, sue happy country where we live.

SO, superintendents are put in yet another non enviable position.  They have to decide what to do.  And they call each other.  I envision lots of scenarios among supers.  In my high school and early teaching years, I didn't know that they all talked to each other to make the decisions.  So, I envisioned Dr. M out there with ihs ruler on his deck measuring to see if there was 5 inches (the fictitious minimum amount to cancel school) at 5am.  Because, the buses have to get out early, so the decision must come at 5 or 5:30.  Dr. M had 5 kids around my age, so I always pictured them huddled around the slider as dad went out to measure and then all the cheering and excitement when he'd say "well kids, let's cancel school.  Who wants to call the radio stations to tell them????"  And all the very sad faces when he said "sorry kids, looks like 4.75 inches.  School's on, now go get dressed" and then they had to face all of their friends who called their father an asshole all day.

Because really, what other pleasure is there in life than to be told you  have a snow day?   I don't really think there can be another unexpected delight.  Even though we all know we have to make up that day.  We know, thank you, we know.  I will never forget June of 2005 when we went to school until, sit down for this, JUNE 30th.  I kid you not.  In all of my years in school, that's since 1979, I have never been in school until that obscene date.  We had a hellacious year of snow and used up those 5 days they build into the calendar and there we were.  The contract says you can't go into July, or I think we might have been one day into it!

So, for the confessor over at untenuredteacher, I know you just recently posted about your mean school district that made you have school on a snow day and you think they were thinking only of money, I'm confused.  We have to make up our snow days, so money isn't an issue here.  I don't quite understand your post.  Will you all not make up that time?  Tell us, please!

Anysnowday, back to what I imagine goes on in the world of today's supers.  I now picture that the email starts several days before:

What do you think?  Is this storm coming?
I dunno.  Will we have to cancel?
Is this going to be like 2005? 
We can't make anyone happy, no matter what we do.

And it all goes round and round.  Then the day before:

Well, the guy on channel 5 says...
Wait, let me see what channel 7 says...
That idiot over on fox news says...
Wait, didn't that idiot graduate from your fine institution a while back?
Oh yeah, well, he can't be trusted.  Remember last week's storm he said we wouldn't get?
Well, I'm not canceling, I don't care if we have 23 feet.  What about you guys? 
I'm not canceling.
I'm not the one who's going to make that call.
Let's all agree not to close school so no one looks like the bad guy!
Yeah, yeah! 

After supper the night before, lots of texts abound:

Think we better cancel.
Yeah, it sounds like it might be big.
We can't have another accident.
Yeah, I'm in.

And so they call and they do the Alert Now and we all do our happy dance.  Well, not all.  The cynics complain that we will just have to make it up in June.  The mothers complain that now they have to actually spend the day with the children and all those kids want to do is drink hot chocolate because they see snow and someone told them snow and hot chocolate are a pair never to be severed.  And then we wait.

And no snow comes.  And people accuse the weathermen of being big liars.  And they say things like "huh, must be nice to have a job where you can just LIE and still get a paycheck"  or "wow, you'd think with all this technology they'd get it right JUST ONCE.  IDIOTS"  And I have indeed said those things.  But I dont' know why.  Because I always find that in June, I can get out of bed MUCH EASIER than I can in January.  And June wardrobes are fun more fun to wear than January wardrobes.  Not that I want to go to school for all of June every year.  But I savor the snow day.

And then I wonder what the supers do on these snow days.  Do they go to their offices?  Do they sit and home and remember the joy of being a teacher and having to stay home and do all the stuff we never do during the week because we're at school?  Do they sleep in?  Does a superintendent ever sleep in?

We have a professional day this Friday, so this week was a lost cause as far as I'm concerned.  Because I see my students 3 days a week, and there are 5 days in a school week, having one day off is a royal pain.  I like to keep everyone in the grade on the same page.  This is very difficult with a week that has less than 5 days.  So, adding a snow day into this week doesn't make me upset at all.

In other news, is it inappropriate to wear a dress to school that you know has holes in it?  Like you see them before you leave the house and you wear it anyway?  BEcause you just bought the dress and you LOVE IT?  And you're pretty sure it looks so great on you that no one will notice?  And because you bought it at Marshall's for 39.99 but the tag you cut off says it was 128.00 so you are sure it's the best quality you've ever seen?  They were kind of near my underarm.  In the back.  No one said a word.

And it turns out, they aren't really holes.  They are, but they are meant to be there.  There should be a thread holding the fabric together in those spots to make that figure 8 pattern you see on the others and somehow they popped out.  But I can fix that. So I am pleased.  HOwever, the dress hugged a little more than I wanted so i wasn't as thrilled as I wanted to be.  It's a knit but it's a loose knit and the bottom is an awesome swingy flair thing.  But I wore them with knit leggings and there was sort of a static thing going on.  If I stood, it was fine, but walking made things kind of bunch at the knees.  But I love the color.  And sometimes that color is smashing on me.

I wore with it a retired lia sophia piece that a woman fell in love with.  I told her if she booked a show, I'd give it to her as a booking piece.  She did.  And I will.  I don't like the piece anyway, so we all win!  Maybe my joy of knowing I had a snow day to look forward to was catchy and that's why she booked.

And sadly, this is my end of technology use for the day.  I wanted to declare today a total tech free day, just to see what would happen.  I have this habit of not using my days off very well and I spend a lot of time in the blogosphere.  This means laundry doesn't get put away and things do not get cleaned up.  And I don't sew or read as I plan.  So, in 25 minutes, I have to shut off the computer.  I am allowed to turn it on once to let my crocheters know (all 13 of them!!) if we are having crocheting this afternoon.  But I have to see what the weather does because I don't want to cancel if I dont' have to.  And then it's going right back off.  I'm strong.  I am sure I can do this.  And it might be because we are having j-ster, c-ster and j-ster over tomorrow for supper and this place looks like a bomb went off in the laundry basket (clean of course) and things must get cleaned up.  Or they might report me.  To the same people that my mother always worried would people would report her to if her house was not straightened out.  I don't live in too much fear of those people, but when my house looks like this, I do.  Oh, you thought I was going to post a picture there?  uh-uh.  A picture couldn't do justice to this clutter.

And in case you were wondering, canceled has just one l but cancellation has 2 ls.  No wonder people in this country cannot spell.

And finally, for those who were worried about the state of my neck, it is better.  Yesterday it was much better and I went to Dr. Chiro for my monthly dance with paralysis and he manipulated my neck and back and it felt really good.  But I woke up today with it tight again.  K-ster should stop dancing on my head while I'm sleeping and maybe this would stop happening.


  1. I have a hard time spelling canceled. It looks weird with one l. I grew up in a town with very hyperactive weathermen. This week, eight inches of snow were forecasted and I didn't believe them. Tomorrow will be our FOURTH day out of school. Which I'm cool with, I love not getting dressed and staying home.

  2. Snow days?..huh?...what are those?
    We just wear our winter coats everywhere all the time where I live, and we don't worry about a little thing called a blizzard.


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